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Today
• Don't panic - best decisions are made with a cool, calm head
• Sit down, relax, and read the divorce papers several times.
• Don't call your spouse in anger - no contact is best for now.
• Read up on divorce - knowledge always helps take the fear away.
• When you finish the above steps, take a short break and then read all of the divorce papers again until you thoroughly understand what is ahead.
• If you have children, do not draw them into the conflict. This is best for your children and will put you in the best position to win custody.
• You have 20 days from the date you received the summons to send an answer.
• If possible, take tomorrow off and devote some thought to the situation.
Tomorrow
• You must decide if you will represent yourself or hire an divorce attorney.
• If you want an attorney, start calling and find one that you like.
• If you are a do-it-yourself person, continue to read about divorce for 7 more days. You have almost two weeks to act and you must become well informed.
• Review the location and amount of all your assets. If possible, remove money from the bank and put it in a place of security. Do not deprive your spouse of necessary funds to live on. That could backfire on you.
• Review your credit cards and any other sources of credit. If possible, cancel cards that are joint accounts or remove your spouse's name from the card.
• Speed is your best tool - be thorough and act today.
• Go into conservation mode and build a rainy day fund. You may soon need it.
• Begin to collect all records of assets, amounts owed, property, deeds, and family business records. If you are in the marital home, keep the records in a more secure place, like with a trusted friend.
• Call the IRS to find out how to request copies of the last 5 years of tax returns - if you don't already have them.
Next Day
• Continue your education. This is one of the biggest and most important projects of your life. Read books and attend seminars. Become an expert.
• Make a financial plan or a household budget for the next 12 months. Don't spend unnecessary money.
• Get a notebook and a holder for paperwork. Set up a central collection point for all the information you gather during your divorce. Keep a detailed diary and jot down anything you learn from your educational efforts.
Copyright 2005 The Divorce Center P.A.
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